We have all been sold the idea of a ‘Soul mate’, by books,
or movies or TV shows. Since time immemorial, man has always been on a quest to
find that one person who is the other half of his soul, the one true companion
who understands and loves him like no other. Times have changed, the world has
progressed tremendously, in various aspects, but what has always remained a
constant is the search for that one true love (unless of course you are a Gujju
chick born with the ‘$’ symbol imprinted on the your eyes and embedded in your
genes; and are also the poster girl for “Gold-diggers Are Us”, in which case
your true love is money, honey).
In our lives, if we are lucky, there comes a time, or a
moment when we tend to get to know a person, a complete stranger, with whom we
seem to form an unexplainable connection. The kind of connection where you have
to merely think of that person and the next moment you receive a call or a text
from that person; you get the drift. And you think to yourself, ‘Man! This is
awesome; is it for real?’ Maybe it is. But them you are also scared as it is
almost too good to be true. You probably think to yourself that maybe you are
making too much of it, and that it isn’t really that spectacular.
Many of us have this image in our heads of ‘The Soul mate’.
We have carried it around in our mind long enough to actually conjure up the
person out of pure imagination. We think, ‘How difficult is it? The world is
huge, surely there is one such person who matches the one I have in my mind?’ there
is nothing wrong in thinking so, only that in the quest of something that is
merely a figment of your imagination, you may tend to let go of the real,
breathing person whom you have a strong bond with. You may tend to let go of
that person just because that person may lack a few traits that you have always
wanted in the love of your life. What is more pitiable is if these traits
happen to be of the physical aspect. What, are you looking for a mannequin to
put up in your shop, or for a life partner?
Everyone has their own fish to fry, and I am no one to judge
or advice. All I can say is think, imagine yourself at the age of say 50, when
you are at the top of the game, have a successful career, beautiful children;
whom would you like to come home to? A gorgeous trophy-wife who is too busy
attending a ‘kitty party’ or splurging your money on an impulsive shopping
spree to give you a warm hug and a kiss when you return home from work; or a
warm and cheerful person who would be all ears when you discuss your day, and
be your rock when your boss gives you a tough day?
This doesn’t only apply to men; women can and are capable of
being equally superficial, if not more. We want others to be envious of us for
having the most good looking person by our side. Its how humans, irrespective
of their gender, are programmed to be; we would rather be envied and approved
of by the society than make ourselves happy by choosing someone who makes us
happy. But are those people whose opinions and approval you give a damn about
going to be there to warm your bed or lend you support when times get rough?
No, its going to be the person you choose to be with. Don’t let go of what
could be the most beautiful relationship of your life for something that may or
may not be.
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